Sometimes I fall apart. You know, messily sobbing in a very un-Minnesotan way. Crying unstoppably. Unceasingly. With no apparent cause. Or maybe there is some minor thing. Some paltry irritation.
Sometimes the minor thing or paltry irritation is in the form of blunt or thoughtless words. Perhaps meant to be "constructive criticism." Which at some times can feel like destructive criticism. Or "tough love" that feels just plain tough.
The universal response to this is shock. Followed by "You seem like such a strong person. I thought you could handle it."
And sometimes I can.
I am a strong person. I know what is important to me. I know what I value. I know what I will and will not do. I have strong opinions which often differ from the norm. I am quite used to bringing "an interesting element of clash" everywhere I go.
But sometimes I am not as strong as at other times. It just looks that way.
On seeming strong:
I don't know that tough love, thinly veiled sarcasm and bluntness taken to an art form are ever a good option. At least not for honest communication. There are better ways of connecting. But for people who are fragile-- often in invisible ways-- these forms of communication can be truly destructive.
Grateful Crap: cool enough to go to meeting again; start of First Day School.
took meds (150mg sertraline, 300mg bupropion)
Quaker worship (albeit shortened by the start of First Day School)
talked to friends
good conversation with sons
Quaker, teacher, parent,