I have decided that the name I will give my special brand of Depression: Persistant Depressive Disorder with a side of Hoopla. And sometimes the hoopla is good (writing a novel, knitting a sweater, beading a necklace) and sometimes not so good (rearranging furniture endlessly, haunting Craigslist and collecting kitchen tables, throwing rocks against the shore for hours and hours every day of vacation...)
I have never tracked the Hoopla before. Never tried to do anything about it. Never thought of it as a thing that could be controlled. Becuase quite frankly sometimes it doesn't feel like it can be controlled. However, in the interest of more steady energy...
I will do the following things:
However, I have not been respoinsible to anyone but myself for my thoughts and behaviors. And I let myself off the hook for all the wrong things and hold myself responsible for ridiculous things.
So, you might ask, how is the Hoopla?
Well, I have been beading, but not to excess. I started a project on Friday and am not even half finished with it and it is not causing me any angst.
I have been moving garden stuff, but not spending more than an hour or so lugging dirt and bricks. This is largely because it is so dang hot and/or humid that I cannot stand to do it for any longer. Fine. I will take what I can get.
I have been avoiding to house declutter because I can't figure out how to not bite off more than I can chew if left to my own devices. Perhaps it is time to phone a friend on that one.
3yo: Mama, these red beads suck. (with a disgusted tone)
3yo: (matter of fact) Because they aren't purple.
bit of project but not too much
Quaker, teacher, parent,