Concert on Friday and then a bus trip to Iowa for another concert on Saturday and then back this morning. Well, this afternoon.
Here are the relative points (from this blog perspective)
Some time after we got on the bus and were well on our way, I noticed that I was missing my beaded cuff... that I knew I had on in the morning. I remember showing it to the person I carpooled with. I had no memory of taking it off.
THIS FREAKED ME OUT COMPLETELY.
I looked through all of my things several times. And then several more times. And then again. Even when it was clear that the cuff could not possibly be among my belongings. I looked all over the floor. And between the seats (where I found someone's really old altoids tin).
Then I asked the carpool friend. No luck. No memory. No cuff.
THEN I FREAKED OUT SOME MORE.
I knew that I had a "spare" cuff in with my luggage beneath the bus, but I was quite distraught over the fact that I didn't know what had happened to the missing one (my first "Starry Night" cuff) and not having a cuff on my wrist-- which doesn't bother me so much any more when I am not anxious-- was contributing to my anxiety.
It took some concerted effort not to fall apart about this. Some effort not to cry. Some effort to not hyperventilate. All of this seems completely childish and ridiculous. But at the time, it didn't feel childish or ridiculous.
I was already a bit anxious about taking a trip away from home with people that I don't know very well. Having to be more social than I usually am. Things being out of the ordinary--even if they are good--can be a bit nervous.
Soooo... to cope with my anxiety I decided to bead.
On a moving bus.
With a tiny little plastic container as my flat surface.
In a freak accident, I spilled beads all over the floor. And then I tried to do something on my phone to distract myself, but the phone battery died.
So then I decided to watch the movie that was playing on the bus and I made myself three lovely little bracelets out of rolled paper so I would feel something on my wrist in the absence of cuff. This helped. Stupid anxiety. Stupid totems.
I then remembered that I had needed to fish my phone out of my pocket while in my friend's car. And it was likely I had taken my cuff off to do so. This made me feel MUCH MUCH MUCH MUCH better. And once we got to our destination I was able to put on my backup cuff, which returned me to almost equilibrium.
Played the concert, which was great. Even though we had a very small audience. Hopefully they were appreciative because it was awesome. Afterwards we went out to dinner where I was acceptably social with people I barely know.
And the call went out that after the bus returned us to the hotel, where we could change or drop things off... we could get a ride to a nearby bar for further socializing.
I don't think I get to take a great deal of credit for getting to sleep at a decent hour instead of going out. Because I don't really drink and I don't really socialize and I was wrung out from the day of bussing and worrying and playing.
Upon our return, my friend found the cuff outside of his truck on the ground. Wet, but otherwise undamaged.
Grateful Crap: that the worst thing that happened to me was I was a bit concerned for a piece of jewelry
socializing (within reason)
Quaker, teacher, parent,