Like many or most people I know I am not a good patient. I am whiny and I don't necessarily want people to take care of me. And I don't particularly like following directions for how long I need to avoid doing whatever it is I need to avoid doing. Or start doing whatever it is that i need to start doing.
I am also a terrible caregiver when people are sick. I feel like saying, "Buck up!" and handing them a box of tissues or a few ibuprofen. Sometimes I will be uncharacteristically huggy of my sick children. But often I will just yell at them to get more rest and stop being so germy.
And when grown-up friends are falling apart and feeling sad and are super stressed out, I pretty much follow the same old "Buck up!" routine complete with tissues and ibuprofen.
Is this new? It feels new.
I remember when other people's problems would completely overwhelm me. I would get pulled down into their abyss. Now I stand back a ways from the edge and kind of wave at them. "Hey there. You doing okay? No? Would you like a kleenex?"
That feels more healthy. For me, I mean.
I still feel sympathy, mind you. And I listen well. This is another one of those things that probably looks the same on the outside, but from within my head is very very different.
So it's following the lifeguard rules. And the rules for those oxygen masks in the airplane. Make sure you are safe before you try to help anyone else. Don't become another victim. Because then someone else will have to rescue you. And that will suck.
And I try to remember what I like when I am a patient. When I am the one in the abyss. And I don't really want someone to be all syrupy and overly emotional. I really just want them to hand me the damn box of tissues and say, "Hey, that sucks. Can I get you some chocolate?"
P.S. I accidentally swore while giving a message in Quaker meeting and now I am overly concerned that someone is going to yell at me for this. If you are reading this and are going to chew me out, can you just assume that I have already eldered myself as appropriate and then some? Thanks.
Grateful Crap: Digital SLR
meds 150mg lamotrigine
walked in the out-of-doors
ate really good Indian food (although I missed having naan since I am not doing grain during October)
Quaker, teacher, parent,