I spent yesterday at home with all three of my children also did not have school due to a late winter ice storm.
I spent the day sitting on my bed beading a new cuff that has designs to represent the norepinephrine molecule.
It’s a neurotransmitter. It’s one that I don’t have enough of. So I figure if I have a few extra on my wrist and they’re really giant maybe that will help.
all I want to do is bead.
what pattern does this follow? What mood state am I in when all I want to do is bead?
My coworker that I jokingly refer to as my “workplace accommodation” is going through some rough times now
which means I need to not rely on her since she needs to be able to lean on me.
luckily I have a deep bench at work. Back up supports. And even if I don’t need anything in particular from anyone, knowing that they are there is a comfort.
Stronger than comfort.
Picked up lurasidone to start officially today. No more bupropion after reviewing my history since it fizzled out before.
I feel wrung out. Physically drained. Tired to the point of tears.
i have spent all day wanting to bead and now that I am home and could do so... I haven’t the strength to pick up a needle nor sight to guide the thread.
when people ask how I’m doing I tell them how my coworker is doing. Which is not what they are asking.
But it is what I am worried about now. That I need to be stronger than I am... not even so I can be a support for her... but so I am not just another thing she needs to take care of.
I am sad.
Quaker, teacher, parent,