There is something about the term "plastic surgery" that makes you not want to tell anyone that you are having it done. Or "elective surgery." Because the one makes you feel vain and the other makes you feel frivolous.
Only here is the thing-- the elective plastic surgery that I had done was neither vain nor frivolous. But I still was not very good about telling people beforehand or afterhand about the "procedure." Because I thought it made me seem frivolous and vain.
So, here is the end of my campaign of disinformation...
I got new boobs.
Okay, I still have the same boobs, there is just substantially less of them.
Prior to the elective, cosmetic procedure, I was an H cup. I bet you didn't even know that existed. But it does. H for HUMUNGOUS. It comes right after G for GINORMOUS. My friends with small boobs would say lovely things like, "Lucky you!" My friends with big boobs would say, "Oh honey..."
Here are some of the difficulties with gigantiboobs that you might not realize
So, on the advice of my regular doc, and in order to improve my overall health, I went under the knife. The surgeon removed two pounds of breast and brought me down to a much more manageable C cup. Whew!
Here are some of my discoveries post-surgery
I was pretty freaked out about having the procedure done right up until the time they put me under. I told the following people that I was having "reduction mammoplasty" prior to surgery (most of them the day before I went to the hospital): Spouse, three friends and my mother.
The recovery was/is kind of uncomfortable. The first few days I was on narcotic pain meds-- which didn't seem to help a lot. I wasn't in pain, per se. I was just... uncomfortable. Surgery will do that to you, I guess. It wasn't pain at the incision site, but swelling that was the issue.
For those of you who have breast fed, it felt an awful lot like I was "engorged." Which can be quite uncomfortable. But I went to the store and bought something called "boo boo buddies" which are little round icepacks intended for little kids. I just called them booby buddies and tucked them into my bra
So far I gotta say my quality of life has improved dramatically even though I am only one month out and not fully recovered from the surgery.
Funny how I am much more comfortable talking about having psychotic episodes than I am discussing breast reduction surgery. Huh.
Quaker, teacher, parent,