I am writing this while still asleep. I have slept for twelve hours possibly or more in a row. I slept poorly last night, but have slept quite well and soundly throughout the day. Body is definitely fighting something off. Or rather fighting off what is already here.
The weather is beautiful but I am sitting in a darkened room. It feels like I feel when I am Depressed and avoiding things, but that is just because it is the same room I would be in and it is dark and I am alone. I don't feel Sad. I just feel BLAH. Lots of coughing. Drinking water and taking inhaler helps. I am really trying to model keeping my asthma in control for my daughter who has newly diagnosed asthma. I just realized today why my doctor was hesitant to write the word "bipolar" on my medical chart. She didn't want it to be flagged by the insurance company as a preexisting condition. Doctors should not need to play those games, but it looks like they do and will and maybe have to. Yuck. I'm pretty sure that "mood disorder" might be picked up as code by insurance folk, but maybe not. Soon I will be done with the last observation of the year. I would be more anxious about it, but I am too lethargic and tired. I realized this past week that I have missed more than two rehearsals for GSW and that perhaps I should not play in the concert. Which would suck. But I have another conflict for our final rehearsal and I feel quite terrible about it. It will not be a disaster if I cannot perform. I will come back in the fall. My sons are both having an orchestra concert this week. The final one at this particular school for elderboy. Can't miss it. I tried to tell myself that I could, but I really can't. I feel terrible about missing rehearsal and I would feel terrible about missing the concert. But I would feel worse about the concert in the long run. So that is that. Missed rehearsal this past week due to mini-migraine that kicked off this dreadful cold that WILL NOT BECOME BRONCHITIS (nor pneumonia). We'll see what the consensus is on whether or not they want me at the concert. Ugh. Stress. Gotta look at some work stuff now. Even though I try not to do that from home often. My time at school this last week was brief (due to hospitalizations of daughter) and scattered (due to sickness of me). Grateful Crap: antibiotics Equatorial Actions: still sleep meds (200mg lamotrigine, ibuprofin, ceterizine, albuterol, fluticasone) more sleep water Comments are closed.
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K. BuchananQuaker, teacher, parent, |