I have never been very big on them anyway. I just use them to beat myself up, and I do enough of that naturally. New Year is not a big thing for me. I watched a movie and was in bed by 11:00. Probably asleep by 11:01. Due to circumstances in and out of my control I am giving myself a "hold" on the 40 bags project. I went a bit mad and tried to get everything done and injured myself. So instead of trying to accomplish more of the impossible I took a break and will resume the project now. Go me. Took meds went to bed on time rested hand I so need to upload pictures. I took a few. Not enough. I don't take pictures in the winter. Or the fall. Don't remember this day. I am catching up on posts again. But I have my computer, so that is good. And my wrist is feeling better. But I still have to take it easy. I think I just hung out in my pajamas all day. For two days. Or something like that. I remembered to take my meds. I stayed up too late. I at WAYYYYY too much sugar. I feel, predictably, kind of yucky. Still mostly held a lid on the stress thing, which is good. following behaviors lately: ducking phone messages, not listening to voicemail, not checking email, eating very many sweets, no exercise, staying up super late, back on the caffeine, staying in the house, not taking pictures... these are behaviors I would like to change. Today I checked my email (at least a little bit) but I would like to go back to the zero inbox or whatever that is called. Crap: hands hurt. Grateful Crap: central heat (baby, it's cold out there) took meds in the morning spent time with family mostly relaxed (slept quite late this morning even though in bed by 11) This holiday season I have found myself channeling my brother. The one who takes everything in stride. The one who can easily dismiss things that aren't his concern as actually not being his concern. And mean it. I have to say, being my brother is AWESOME. When someone says something negative I don't assume that they are targeting me. And even if they are, I figure that is their problem and not mine. Freaky! Sledding this morning. Comedy of errors trying to find a place to do so. Dinner this afternoon with family. Relaxed for the most part. Didn't stress out about stuff really. I am beginning to think that exchanging gifts should be adamantly optional. Not forbidden. But equally fine to give or not to give as the spirit moves you, as time and budget allow, and whenever the heck you want to. Crap: gotta stop typing took meds in the morning time with family time outside steamed pudding I didn't quite remember everything I needed. This will be my epitaph. I wonder how many epitaphs I have already suggested. Typing little still. Frelling tendons. Don't have my computer. No access to my own photos... so I stole a picture (that I may or may not have taken) from my mom's computer. Cousins. Grateful Crap: being on break while I can't type much. Enforces the vacation from work part of this break thing. took meds in the morning did not try to get everything done and as a result did NOT get everything done talked with a friend sick child, tendonitis, "knitter's elbow," can't knit, can't sew, can't wash dishes, can't play cards, can't type. so, short post. had to postpone boxing day dinner. grateful crap: anti-inflammatory drugs Daily Convexions took meds in the morning used happy light I made three batches of rolls this morning. One came out like hockey pucks. The other would have been fine exept that I let it sit in the pan too long after it came out of the oven and the third batch was on the doughy side... And I got a bit fixated on this for a while. If we had had any more ingredients for the carmel sauce I might have made another batch in the attempt to get things Just Right. I pointed out to the spouse later that I had been remarkably calm and not stressed out about the holidays. The importance of spending time together and eating good food trumped going crazy and trying to get The Perfect Gift. Also, relaxing trumped trying to run around and see EVERYONE on or near Christmas. So if you are disappointed in my stingy gift-giving or lack thereof, well I guess that is your problem. Because I am not going to feel guilty about it. And neither should you. I might just decide to give you something at a random time in another part of the year. Or not. Maybe we'll just have tea. Looking forward to having dinner at a friend's house tomorrow. We are staging a relaxed Christmas-type dinner. Calm. Enjoyable. Relaxing. Today after opening presents and eating rolls I slept for a LONG time. Also was running a low fever. Connection to the lack of bupropion in my system recently? Worth checking. Grateful Crap: One of my students has passed 4 out of her 5 tests for the GED. She texted me that she needed help finding a place to retake the writing exam and I found her somewhere that is open this coming Friday and the following Monday. I hope she passes. But even if she does not, I am grateful that she deciced to try before 2014 and the entire test changes... Daily Convexions Took Meds 150 mg sertraline, 450 mg bupropion spent time with family mostly didn't stress out about stuff not working just right (other than the whole roll thing) Now, who do I need to contact when the holidays are through? Allergist, opthalmologist and dentist. Stupid temporary filling came out. Was hoping that if I ignored the fact that I need to get a crown my tooth would magically regrow. This has failed to occur. Saw people, exchanged gifts, ate stuff, forgot things. This is an excellent summary. Unfortunately one of the things I forgot was the bag with unfinished presents that I intended to work on. Oh well. It freed up my evening. My wrist hurts. It hurts a lot. I am typing weirdly because of it. I think I need to keep these posts short and go ice it. Crap. I hate overuse things. And that is what it feels like. Stupid tendons. Grateful Crap: watching a two and three year old cousin chase each other around and play hide and seek and laugh and laugh and laugh. Daily Convextions:
My family observes the Swedish tradition of having the important Christmas meal on Christmas Eve. In my mom's family it is when they opened all the presents as well. We split the difference-- opening most of the presents on Christmas morning, but opening a few on Christmas eve following the all-important family dinner. I did the last of the shopping. Wrapped some stuff. Made some stuff. Felted some stuff. Here was the funny disaster... I was felting mittens for a number of people. I felt them in my old top-loading washing machine. And although the mittens for my oldest son and my youngest nephew turned out fine, the mittens for the daughter and my mom were too small on the whole and had thumbs that sort of felted together. So I sacrificed the mittens as raw material to make a bunch of flower petals. When I get a round tuitt I will take a picture of the finished project. I will tell you on one of the subsequent posts why the item is still not done. Grateful Crap: From the middle "I don't know why people talk about Christmas Day. There are a lot of Christmas days. You know, like the seven days of Christmas... but there is only one Christmas Eve." Still was not feeling well. Slightly feverish. But I didn't notice that until later in the day. Went to meeting and the kids came in and there were some minor problems that were dealt with appropriately with the help of someone who was not me. Middle child was giggling at a friend of his and an unrelated adult placed herself strategically between them. Perfect.
The other awesome thing that happened was that the youngest one came in with an armful of stuffed animals (to serve as a focus and make it easier to sit quietly with the whole community). When she saw that her brother was grumpy she tried-- very very quietly-- to cheer him up by giving him a stuffed skunk. When that didn't work she tried the bunny. That failing, she pulled out the big guns and tried the stuffed snake-- pointing out that it had his favorite color on it so it should make him feel better. Grateful Crap: Having a faith community that feels like home (when I let it.) Daily Convexions: Finally took meds -- 150mg sertraline, 450mg bupropion went to meeting spent time with middle child-- need to do this more often |
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K. BuchananQuaker, teacher, parent, |